The ending should have a twist... or should it?


Sarah sank into an armchair and let out a satisfied sigh. It was good to be home. As remarkable as it seemed, the house was just as she’d left it, all those weeks ago. Or if there were differences, they were small things – a layer of dust on the furniture, a pile of unopened letters in the hallway, the gentle click of a pistol being cocked. Wait, what?
‘Get down on the floor!’ screamed the masked gunman, kicking open the kitchen door. ‘Face down! Face down!’ Sarah hesitated for a moment.
‘Freddie?’ she said. ‘Freddie, is that you?’ The gunman froze.
‘No,’ he said.
‘What are you doing?’ asked Sarah. ‘I thought we were a team.’
‘We were,’ whispered Freddie. ‘But that was before...’ He reached up to his face and gripped his mask. Sarah braced herself. ‘Before...’ He pulled aside the fabric. Sarah couldn’t look. ‘Before this,’ he said, throwing the mask to the floor. ‘Look at me, Sarah. Look at what you’ve done to me.’ She slowly raised her eyes to his. A second passed. ‘You did this, Sarah,’ he said. ‘You gave me this big smile by being so lovely.’ Sarah grinned back at him.
‘You big silly,’ she said. ‘You had me worried there.’
‘Worried? He laughed. ‘What could there possibly be to worry about? It’s all safe again. We won, Sarah.’
‘I think you mean I won,’ said Sarah, turning into a werewolf which she had been all along and eating him.

46 comments:

  1. *bursts into spontaneous applause*

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  2. I hope you dropped a few subtle clues, such as her having to shave her legs three times a day and only eating raw meat?

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  3. Bahahaha *presses fingertips together* Excellent.

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  4. I've just stumbled upon your site, and you've got me in stitches, man! This is the stuff of legends!

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  5. Thank you, Joel, just, thank you.

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  6. Flipin' hilarious! I can't stop laughing.

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  7. Well. The comments on this post are frankly embarrassing. Thank you all for your continued support and encouragement, even when my posting of new entries slows to a crawl.

    And if there are any new readers here (which google analytics guesses there probably are), you’ve got 200 old posts and a 40-minute live show to get through, so what are you waiting for?

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  8. I was gonna say "pass me a bucket" when it got all a bit soppy... But the eating bit cheered me up.

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  9. "Mr. Stickley, M. Night Shyamalan on line two. He said something about this twist being better than anything he's come up with lately, and he wants you to delete it."

    Seriously, though, I think I may have laughed more at this one than any other. Bravo!

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  10. I'm so glad you posted the live shows because now when I read your wonderful stories, I can picture them with your voice and intonation. It makes them all the more hilarious! Thanks for always brightening my day!

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  11. LAUGHING! lawd -- :-D (here from a facebook link)

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  12. OH MY GOD. hilarious. best thing i've stumbled upon yet.
    <3 niree

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  13. I don't care if you think it's bad writing. I just found out how I will propose.

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  14. Laughing out loud.

    You are amazing.

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  15. That ending was a memorable gem to be remembered in literary history.

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  16. Sorry to be spamming, but I just can't help but laugh at my previous comment since it applies to your post on Feb 25. The cool thing is, it's unintentional!

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  17. And then, John was a zombie. d=

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  18. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  22. She slowly raised her eyes to his. A second passed

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